Archive for the ‘Office Politics’ Category
Is It Better to Be Liked or Feared?
16November 2011
Do you find your newly promoted manager vacillating between wanting to be feared and needing to be liked? It may be that the new position requires interpersonal skills that the manager doesn’t possess. He was great at his previous job where working solo was a necessity, but how to lead a team currently eludes him.
Therefore, he swings from being a power player —someone who rules the roost through fear—to a pushover— someone who will do anything to please. This can make you feel as if you’re on an emotional roller coaster—trying to determine what type of TOT he’s going to be today.
In my latest BloombergBusinessWeek article I posted that instead of vacillating between being power players and pushovers, leaders should try to earn respect. A recent LinkedIn discussion I led supported this premise. Most members of the Human Resource Management group felt that in order to garner respect, being liked is indeed better than being feared—but that at times some fear of authority is necessary to get the job done.
Has a Terrible Two tantrum ever been thrust upon you? Please take a look at BloombergBusinessWeek for a perspective on how real power thrives on respect.
TOT-taming for Beleaguered Office Workers
6November 2011
TOT-taming is reaching out to more beleaguered office workers this month with articles appearing in Forbes, CBS/MoneyWatch and Media Bistro. Forbes highlighted Seven Ways to Tame an Office Tyrant — don’t let them see you sweat, listen actively, be a role model, be a problem solver, harness strengths and weaknesses, use humor and show empathy. Of course, in my book, there are many more tips. Check them out!
At CBS/MoneyWatch you’ll find suggestions on what to do When Your Boss Acts like a Toddler, which included my favorite acronym: CALM—Communicate, Anticipate, Laugh and Manage. Communicate with your boss openly, honestly and frequently. Anticipate problems before they become larger problems and have solutions ready. Levity helps break tension, diffuses issues and punch through barriers. Managing up doesn’t mean kissing up. It means speaking the truth and setting expectations with your boss.
In Media Bistro’s Dealing with the Terrible Office Tyrant (TOT) I told public relations professionals that the onus was on them to spot a TOT and put some real teeth behind that great PR reputation. With some behind the scenes TOT-taming they can increase those moments of agency euphoria.
Try some TOT-taming techniques in November, as the holidays and a short month create a fertile environment for more stress!
The Art Of Quitting (Or Staying)
3May 2011
Jenna Goudreau, who runs a diverse and informative women-oriented column on Forbes.com touches upon a very important subject in her recent article, The Dos And Don’ts Before Leaving Your Job. A study by insurance provider MetLife shows that 36% of workers are planning a fresh start in 2011. If you are one of them, there is a warning for you from career experts, including yours truly: when heading for the exit, “watch your step” and don’t make mistakes that may trip you up in the future.
For example, you should make sure your bosses and co-workers don’t see your departure as a let-down for the company and make the transition as smooth as possible.
“Workplace expert Lynn Taylor, author of Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant, suggests employees consider their response to a counter offer before they resign,”– the article says. But don’t be lured by money if there are deeper problems with the business or its management.
Whatever the situation might be, I advise against letting negative emotions fly – biting your tongue will increase your chances of a positive recommendation.
Another vital issue is prepping your replacement and following up after you leave. This responsibility, while important, should certainly be limited, and the article quotes my recommendations in this regard.
As the final step, I recommend spending some extra time to look around and tie up loose ends, making sure your “clean break” is literally clean.
The article – that you should read in its entirety – will help you if you are leaving your job, but have you given enough thought to this important step? Is it absolutely the only thing to do? In my recent article for Psychology Today I advise to “look before you leap.” Do this before making your current job a “thing of the past”:
Examine practical risks associated with leaving.
Create a “Solutions” document, to examine what can be done to improve your situation.
Make your “Skills Inventory” and see what additional skills you can offer in your current position.
Revert negative thinking and examine what’s right with your current job, instead of focusing on “wrongs.”
For more, read the complete article here.
Of course, sometimes moving on is the only way to move ahead. That’s why my next blog will be on When It’s Time to Leave Your Job. But for now, let’s have another look at our “bird in the hand” that for some reason we don’t like anymore.
Survey: Boss Behavior Causes Rampant Worrying
18January 2010
Workplace Expert, Author, Provides Career Tips for 2010 and Beyond
SANTA MONICA, Calif., Jan. 13 — According to a new survey released today by national workplace expert Lynn Taylor, author of Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant™ (TOT) (John Wiley & Sons), U.S. employees spend 19.2 hours a week (13 hours during the work week and 6.2 hours on the weekend) worrying about “what a boss says or does.”
The national study was conducted by an independent global research firm and commissioned by Taylor’s firm, Lynn Taylor Consulting, which offers workshops on how to humanize the workplace for increased productivity and profitability.
Taylor said, “The study illustrates the tremendous drain that a manager’s words and actions can have on the minds and work product of its most valued asset – people – at a time when companies can least afford the loss. Particularly during this period of high unemployment, bad boss behavior can go into overdrive – distracting employees from the work at hand.”
“Conversely, the survey suggests that greater interpersonal sensitivity can significantly boost morale and help a company thrive,” Taylor said. She advises managers to go the extra mile by showing interest in the team’s well-being. “Employees’ careers are not on hold, even if major corporate initiatives are,” she added. Taylor said that spillover anxiety on weekends of 3.1 hours a day further underscores how critical the boss/employee dynamic truly is.
“Employees should take the initiative in 2010 to build their own human relations skills,” Taylor said. She added, “Tackle issues early on with diplomacy and deploy good ‘parenting skills’ in the office – without patronizing. Use positive and negative reinforcement; provide positive role modeling; humor; and set limits to unreasonable demands with tact, showing the benefits of an alternative compromise.”
The U.S. study was based on telephone interviews conducted with 1,000 respondents 18 years of age or older. For more information, visit www.LynnTaylorConsulting.com and www.TameYourTOT.com or call 1-800-454-0083.
About Lynn Taylor Consulting
Lynn Taylor is the founder of Lynn Taylor Consulting, which advises companies on how to humanize the workplace. A nationally recognized workplace expert, dynamic speaker and acclaimed author, Taylor is the author of the book, Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant™ (TOT); How to Manage Childish Boss Behavior and Thrive in Your Job (John Wiley & Sons, July 2009).
HOLIDAY OFFICE TALES FOR THE BAD BOSS BLUES
3December 2009
In case you missed it, here is a recap of some chilly bad boss stories that should bring some levity, holiday cheer, or at least commiseration to your day - along with some coping tips:
If you’ve been working for a Grinch, Ice Queen or a “Tiny TOT” boss during the past tumultuous year, there is hope – or at least holiday cheer of the commiseration kind.
In a recent national survey commissioned by Lynn Taylor, a national workplace expert, respondents shared boss anecdotes that were more reminiscent of amped-up tots in toyland than professionals at work. Says Taylor, “The study’s anecdotes are proof positive that when it comes to the office, ‘the child within’ should stay there.”
Taylor, author of Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant™ (TOT): How to Manage Childish Boss Behavior and Thrive in Your Job (John Wiley), is CEO of Lynn Taylor Consulting (LTC), which coaches CEOs on boosting morale and profits – that is, mitigating “TOT” (Terrible Office Tyrant) behavior that hurts productivity. The global firm that conducted the survey collected over 1,000 boss stories, some of which follow:
Tantrum Throwing
· “The boss missed his flu shot and started screaming at me so that the entire office heard him.” (Obviously something was already “bugging” him.)
· “The senior VP threw a fit because a new employee took the last cookie in the break room.” (Maybe there was no warm milk there, either.)
· “As he stomped out of company meetings the boss would growl under his breath.” (These days if you listen closely, it’s “Bah, humbug.”)
· “At the headquarters office, she’d wag her finger, then immediately throw something.” (Her rattle, perhaps?)
· “The boss called everything we did ‘trash.’ Then one day the owner overheard it, and he was dismissed in two weeks.” (Was Santa peeking through the vent?)
· “My boss left her briefcase at a client’s office, and then screamed at me because I didn’t immediately have an answer for what to do.” (A good case for having that handy Magic 8-Ball.)
Taylor says that toddlers and “Terrible Office Tyrants,” whether bosses, co-workers or team members, both throw tantrums because they all have trouble modulating their power. She offers some solace, however: “If there’s something in it for your boss, you can usually effect change.”
Taylor suggests using C.A.L.M. when managers slip into TOT moments:
Communicate – Bravely and frequently reach out to your boss – and be aware of your TOT’s preferred communication method, e.g., e-mails, voice mails, meetings or texts.
Anticipate – Know your timing, and bring solutions to meetings, not problems.
Laugh – Use levity to break down barriers and forge bonds, even with seeming adversaries.
Manage – Assume a “parental” role without patronizing, use proactive problem solving and positive role modeling, but always set limits to bad behavior. If matters are egregious or escalate, take more serious action.
Self-Centered
· “My boss decided to move into a larger office, so he made every employee move to accommodate him.” (He was always good at “musical chairs.”)
· “She asked me to go get her a latte and a biscotti. I got into a car accident, and when I got back, she only asked me if I got her the food.” (Was she teething?)
· “The team received a plaque for developing a great program, but the boss hung it in his office even though he didn’t play any role at all.” (And he basked in his reflection off its epoxy resin.)
· “My boss said I could not speak with her unless I first asked permission.” (Would that be “Mother may I?”)
· “The CEO almost rammed my car when I parked in an unmarked spot that ‘belonged’ to her.” (She needed to learn not to break other people’s toys.)
· “My manager made me work late because her boss took a day off for shopping, and my manager couldn‘t.” (“If I can’t have fun no one else will either!” said the Grinch.)
A related survey commissioned by Lynn Taylor Consulting found that bad, childish boss behaviors have increased over a five-year period, with self-centeredness moving to the top. The good news, according to Taylor, is that these traits can be defused by understanding their causes and by being proactive.
Needy
· “My boss gave gifts to those employees who kissed up to him, not those who did the best work.“ (He never really “got” those Rudolph lyrics.)
· “The boss would spend the first half hour in the morning singing and the whole department was forced to listen.” (He was out of tune with the need for peace on earth and goodwill to staff.)
· “At Friday staff meetings, our boss would often ask if we wanted to hang with her, which we didn’t.” (A severe case of separation anxiety.)
· “He asked me five times if I thought his wireless presentation made a good impression.” (Look Ma, no hands!)
· “The boss would come by every two hours to see if I ‘needed any help.’” (Pacifier anyone?)
· “Our boss loves to talk and so she keeps all kinds of candy in her office so people will come in.” (It’s the most wonderful time…of her day!)
“Keep in mind,” Taylor says, “that a needy TOT can have an overwhelming feeling of neglect, but this can be a good time to get your projects approved.”
Taylor’s holiday tip: if your boss is a TOT or Scrooge don’t allow your holidays to be hijacked. According to Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant (TOT), you can learn to manage your manager, while you humanize your workplace. You’ll have a healthier start to 2010 – and others will thank you for it.
Watch YouTube for additional childish boss stories.
