Archive for the ‘Boss stories’ Category
TOT-taming for Beleaguered Office Workers
6November 2011
TOT-taming is reaching out to more beleaguered office workers this month with articles appearing in Forbes, CBS/MoneyWatch and Media Bistro. Forbes highlighted Seven Ways to Tame an Office Tyrant — don’t let them see you sweat, listen actively, be a role model, be a problem solver, harness strengths and weaknesses, use humor and show empathy. Of course, in my book, there are many more tips. Check them out!
At CBS/MoneyWatch you’ll find suggestions on what to do When Your Boss Acts like a Toddler, which included my favorite acronym: CALM—Communicate, Anticipate, Laugh and Manage. Communicate with your boss openly, honestly and frequently. Anticipate problems before they become larger problems and have solutions ready. Levity helps break tension, diffuses issues and punch through barriers. Managing up doesn’t mean kissing up. It means speaking the truth and setting expectations with your boss.
In Media Bistro’s Dealing with the Terrible Office Tyrant (TOT) I told public relations professionals that the onus was on them to spot a TOT and put some real teeth behind that great PR reputation. With some behind the scenes TOT-taming they can increase those moments of agency euphoria.
Try some TOT-taming techniques in November, as the holidays and a short month create a fertile environment for more stress!
Holiday Season Separation Anxiety
14December 2010
Having tied all loose ends at work, you are about to take a well-deserved holiday vacation. But do you feel that your boss is uncomfortable letting you go, as if even more is expected of you in addition to all you’ve done?
Fear is a big driver, and when bosses - and kids - don’t have control, such as with matters of a vacation from work, a “terrible office tyrant” or “TOT” can emerge.
A needy boss wants constant assurance that you will take care of all needs and deadlines, holiday or not. Some ‘TOTs’ at the helm may be taking shorter vacations themselves, particularly at smaller companies, which can exacerbate the sense that you’re abandoning ship.
Don’t let this feeling follow you home and overshadow your holidays. Read more on how to take a stress-free vacation in my recent article for PsychologyToday.com.
HOLIDAY OFFICE TALES FOR THE BAD BOSS BLUES
3December 2009
In case you missed it, here is a recap of some chilly bad boss stories that should bring some levity, holiday cheer, or at least commiseration to your day - along with some coping tips:
If you’ve been working for a Grinch, Ice Queen or a “Tiny TOT” boss during the past tumultuous year, there is hope – or at least holiday cheer of the commiseration kind.
In a recent national survey commissioned by Lynn Taylor, a national workplace expert, respondents shared boss anecdotes that were more reminiscent of amped-up tots in toyland than professionals at work. Says Taylor, “The study’s anecdotes are proof positive that when it comes to the office, ‘the child within’ should stay there.”
Taylor, author of Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant™ (TOT): How to Manage Childish Boss Behavior and Thrive in Your Job (John Wiley), is CEO of Lynn Taylor Consulting (LTC), which coaches CEOs on boosting morale and profits – that is, mitigating “TOT” (Terrible Office Tyrant) behavior that hurts productivity. The global firm that conducted the survey collected over 1,000 boss stories, some of which follow:
Tantrum Throwing
· “The boss missed his flu shot and started screaming at me so that the entire office heard him.” (Obviously something was already “bugging” him.)
· “The senior VP threw a fit because a new employee took the last cookie in the break room.” (Maybe there was no warm milk there, either.)
· “As he stomped out of company meetings the boss would growl under his breath.” (These days if you listen closely, it’s “Bah, humbug.”)
· “At the headquarters office, she’d wag her finger, then immediately throw something.” (Her rattle, perhaps?)
· “The boss called everything we did ‘trash.’ Then one day the owner overheard it, and he was dismissed in two weeks.” (Was Santa peeking through the vent?)
· “My boss left her briefcase at a client’s office, and then screamed at me because I didn’t immediately have an answer for what to do.” (A good case for having that handy Magic 8-Ball.)
Taylor says that toddlers and “Terrible Office Tyrants,” whether bosses, co-workers or team members, both throw tantrums because they all have trouble modulating their power. She offers some solace, however: “If there’s something in it for your boss, you can usually effect change.”
Taylor suggests using C.A.L.M. when managers slip into TOT moments:
Communicate – Bravely and frequently reach out to your boss – and be aware of your TOT’s preferred communication method, e.g., e-mails, voice mails, meetings or texts.
Anticipate – Know your timing, and bring solutions to meetings, not problems.
Laugh – Use levity to break down barriers and forge bonds, even with seeming adversaries.
Manage – Assume a “parental” role without patronizing, use proactive problem solving and positive role modeling, but always set limits to bad behavior. If matters are egregious or escalate, take more serious action.
Self-Centered
· “My boss decided to move into a larger office, so he made every employee move to accommodate him.” (He was always good at “musical chairs.”)
· “She asked me to go get her a latte and a biscotti. I got into a car accident, and when I got back, she only asked me if I got her the food.” (Was she teething?)
· “The team received a plaque for developing a great program, but the boss hung it in his office even though he didn’t play any role at all.” (And he basked in his reflection off its epoxy resin.)
· “My boss said I could not speak with her unless I first asked permission.” (Would that be “Mother may I?”)
· “The CEO almost rammed my car when I parked in an unmarked spot that ‘belonged’ to her.” (She needed to learn not to break other people’s toys.)
· “My manager made me work late because her boss took a day off for shopping, and my manager couldn‘t.” (“If I can’t have fun no one else will either!” said the Grinch.)
A related survey commissioned by Lynn Taylor Consulting found that bad, childish boss behaviors have increased over a five-year period, with self-centeredness moving to the top. The good news, according to Taylor, is that these traits can be defused by understanding their causes and by being proactive.
Needy
· “My boss gave gifts to those employees who kissed up to him, not those who did the best work.“ (He never really “got” those Rudolph lyrics.)
· “The boss would spend the first half hour in the morning singing and the whole department was forced to listen.” (He was out of tune with the need for peace on earth and goodwill to staff.)
· “At Friday staff meetings, our boss would often ask if we wanted to hang with her, which we didn’t.” (A severe case of separation anxiety.)
· “He asked me five times if I thought his wireless presentation made a good impression.” (Look Ma, no hands!)
· “The boss would come by every two hours to see if I ‘needed any help.’” (Pacifier anyone?)
· “Our boss loves to talk and so she keeps all kinds of candy in her office so people will come in.” (It’s the most wonderful time…of her day!)
“Keep in mind,” Taylor says, “that a needy TOT can have an overwhelming feeling of neglect, but this can be a good time to get your projects approved.”
Taylor’s holiday tip: if your boss is a TOT or Scrooge don’t allow your holidays to be hijacked. According to Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant (TOT), you can learn to manage your manager, while you humanize your workplace. You’ll have a healthier start to 2010 – and others will thank you for it.
Watch YouTube for additional childish boss stories.
