Archive for September, 2008
TOT Taming Tips: The Fall Rush is On!
21September 2008
Dear Lynn,
The last two weeks of August were great. Everyone was on vacation and I got a lot done. This is the first time I could even do much of anything outside of work. There’s been a one crisis after another following Labor Day. I hardly recognize the boss I knew in early August. Fall is here! Any ideas you can offer?
–Fall-ing!
Dear Fall-ing,
Yes…it’s Back to School, Back to Work, and often Back to Chaos in the fall – especially if you’re surrounded by TOTs (Terrible Office Tyrants)™! If you feel like you’re stuck in “TOT soup” right now, you’re not alone! There’s often pressure from the top under normal circumstances to make up for lost ground over the lazy days of summer – which can spread through the office like wildfire. But with an uncertain economy, you may have much more on your plate than you expected.
This is an opportune time to deploy TOT taming skills! The boss you knew in August is still the same person, but is just showing that TOT façade! So first look at the situation from a humanistic, broader perspective. That said, don’t allow yourself to be swallowed up by the current tornado. As you would with a small child or human being who is placing unreasonable demands on you, take back control. More specifically, take the initiative to get agreement with your boss on project priorities, including exact deadlines. Make special efforts now to communicate regularly, on a planned basis if possible – but be concise. Also, make sure you have thought out solutions to problems – before merely presenting issues to a frazzled boss!
Finally, remember that everyone can use a calm voice of reason during this period. You can’t control the economy or the pinch of ever-growing projects. But your actions and demeanor can remind others that now is the time to be focused and strategic. Soon, you’ll likely feel much more in the driver’s seat – and maybe even serve as a role model to some of the TOTs on board!
Best regards,
Lynn
Got a TOT? You’re not alone! Dare to share your story at the TOT Blog with other TOT tamers in the making, while Lynn helps you: cope with difficult or childish bosses and office politics, and humanize your workplace™. Post your question for Lynn, and she will try her best to answer it in an upcoming TOT Tamer Advice Column. Be sure to visit the Tame Your TOT site.
TOT Taming Tips: Breaking Free From The Desk
9September 2008
Dear Lynn,
My boss relies on me for everything. He acts like a child and throws a fit if I even step away from my desk even for a second. The moment I return he asks me where I went and I why I left. I know that as a senior admin, he needs a lot of hands-on support from me, but he expects me to sit at my desk for ten hours straight every day! I’m not sure if there’s anything I can do but I’m hoping you can give me some advice.
–No More Non-Stop Work
Dear Non-Stop,
Your boss is displaying separation anxiety. Just like when a small child throws a tantrum when left alone, your boss somehow believes you are never coming back from that coffee break. Of course, the toddler might be placated with a teddy bear or a favorite cartoon. You, on the other hand, will need to find alternative security blankets.
Watch his patterns and plan ahead. Is he needier or moodier at certain times of the day? If so, you might want to adjust your schedule to be available then. Do certain things set him off? Consider “weaning” him from e-mails over the lunch hour, if bad news upsets him, or route his phone to voice-mail if you aren’t there to screen calls.
You need to establish ground rules, firmly but gently. Let him know that you need to take small breaks throughout the day and give him plenty of advanced warning as to when, and how long you will be away. Assure him that all of your work will be covered when you are gone, and then reinforce that by pointing out that “everything looks like it’s in good shape” when you return. If he still fears your departure, remind him that you will return shortly and will then help him with whatever problem he has.
This needs to be a gradual process. If you move too quickly, he may panic and be even more clingy. Although you sound like you are ready for a day off, start by taking short, scheduled breaks and slowly expanding your free time to normal levels. If all else fails, think about getting that teddy bear, after all.
Best regards,
Lynn
Got a TOT? You’re not alone! Dare to share your story at the TOT Blog with other TOT tamers in the making, while Lynn helps you: cope with difficult or childish bosses and office politics, and humanize your workplace™. Post your question for Lynn, and she will try her best to answer it in an upcoming TOT Tamer Advice Column. Be sure to visit the Tame Your TOT site.
Communication Secrets: The One-On-One Meeting
2September 2008
One of the secrets of a healthy boss/employee relationship is great communication. I believe that you should meet with your boss regularly to build rapport and address questions directly. However, if you have a contentious relationship with your manager, you might have had mixed results in meetings, especially if your past attempts only dealt with your problems and gripes.
My recommendation: invest in good communication over the long-term. That includes setting up a predictable schedule for meetings, so both of you can be prepared – and neither of you feels blindsided by a surprise meeting. Be organized and prepare a basic agenda to keep the meetings on track and on schedule.
Finally, bring some balance to the meetings. Don’t just bring problems to the meetings. That casts a very dark cloud over every meeting, and your boss may understandably want to avoid regular gloom. Bring some positivity to your pow-wow. Share a status update and discuss your accomplishments since the last meeting. And don’t make it all about you…ask your boss how things are going. You might be able to help her with some of her problems, which might make her a little bit more sunny too.
Best regards,
Lynn
